What have I been up to? Why, saving the universe!!!!!1

This January, I've been trying to keep myself busy. I have two jobs, and occasional babysitting gigs, both of which are really helping me to make back the, I shit you not, 100 dollars a week I spent on outside food in Ohio.
Honestly, I have no idea how that happened. Plus, I don't know how I didn't gain a shit ton of poundage.
whatever.
But that isn't what this post is about.
This post is about my calling, my creed. It's about what I've really been doing this month.
What have I really been doing?

Playing Starcraft.

I have been commanding armies of swift zerglings and vicious hydralisks.
I have been building nests, infecting enemies, protecting chrysalae, all from the comfort of my dining room.

What? I meant Command Center.

This is a zergling, it's the basis of any strong zerg force.

Nobody can stand up to me, not the feeble humanoid terrans, with their nuclear force and firebat troops, not even the alien protoss with their lasers and warp rifts.

Fuck all the haters, I am an intergalactic warrior now, and I am lovin' it.

From now on, the only type of party I'm ever gonna go to is a LAN party.